mortality cartographer (beeooll) wrote,
mortality cartographer

The strangest feeling in the world.

Roughly four years ago there was something that I would have given everything I had for. Today I found out that all I have to do is pick up the phone and it's pretty much mine. The twisted part of it all is that I really don't want it now.

I feel like I'm screwing the universe on this one. I prayed and prayed and wanted and longed for this. It was on my mind constantly. Now that it can be mine... now that it is easily attainable... well as I said, I don't want it.

What a really fucking weird sensation.
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